Let's Get Real about Ascension!

By; Jelaila Starr jelaila@gte.net

Nibiruan Council

Physical Stability


I find that the greatest value in walking the ascension path is being able to take control of your physical health and heal yourself. I have cured myself of Carpal Tunnel Syndrome but still battle with Fibromyalgia due to my caretaking (enabling and rescuing) behaviors. Though I still get massages, use chiropractors, and sometimes have Reiki treatments, I know that my true and complete healing is in my hands. I know that all my dis-ease is rooted in my emotions and fears. This is empowering and freeing in a sense because I know that I no longer have to depend on some doctor/god. It gives me a feeling of equality that has been missing in my life with medical doctors.

I used to hold them in contempt because I felt they had something (the power to heal) that I didn't. Now I see them in a different light. I will still go to them for broken bones and things that they can help me with that I do not have the expertise to treat for myself, but that is all. And I now appreciate and value them as partners in my health instead of as gods who used to do it all for me.


Before I began this ascension path, my body was in pretty good shape. You could say that I have been blessed with good health and a resilient and strong body. But since that choice was made, I have suffered from acute Fibromyalgia and Carpal Tunnel Syndrome among other things. It is like my body fell apart once I decided to go for the goal of ascension. And there are times when I am sorely tempted to go to someone else to heal me, but each time I have that desire, I remember that it will no longer work for me and will only prolong my pain and make my lessons harder. When the pain of aching joints, muscles and migraine headaches get to me, I long for something to eradicate the pain.

When I chose to walk the ascension path, within that decision, unbeknownst to me at the time, was also the choice to take full responsibility for healing myself. It took me a long time and a lot of pain to realize that. Now I know that I can stop the pain when I finally have had enough and ask my soul to show me the way to release the pattern and the physical pain. This is how I cured the Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

I believe that this choice is also the reason why so many healers are no longer able to do the type of healing work that they used to do. Those involved in taking out implants, healing viruses, etc. seem to be experiencing headaches and illness after treating a patient. They are having to make changes in their work-changes that allow the patient to heal themselves after being taught by the healer how to do it. Healing techniques are no longer proprietary. They are to be taught by healer-teachers to the patient so that the patient can heal themselves. This, I understand, is the way it is done in the higher realms. It is self-empowering.

Weight Loss/Weight Gain is another one of the challenges that face us during the ascension process. To say that we will only gain or only lose it is a fallacy. I have found that once we make the choice to clear our emotional baggage and ascend, our Egos/inner children go into panic and begin to add weight to our bodies as protection again the fears that we have, and up to that point, been unable to integrate. As a result, I have seen myself gain 5 to 10 lbs. in less than a month and then loose that weight only weeks later. I have also found that my dietary habits have absolutely nothing to do with my weight. It all depends on my emotional state, the lessons being brought forward and the fears up to be integrated.

What I have found over the last 4 years of my ascension journey is that I will lose the weight once I integrate the fear, create new personal boundaries and agreements to protect my inner child and modify my behavior based on those new boundaries and agreements. I know for a fact that what I eat has nothing to do with it so I eat what I like and forget about dieting and restriction. Ascension is difficult enough without adding dieting to the equation.

Known Pitfalls

As I mentioned earlier, I know that I can cure myself of any disease since I am aware that all disease is rooted in my behavior patterns and their corresponding fears and emotions. But the biggest pitfall in healing the body during ascension is the very reason that I haven't completely cured myself of Fibromyalgia. The behavior patterns that cause disease are in most cases very addictive and have value. Take for example the pattern that causes Fibromyalgia. Caretaking provides me with a sense of personal control and emotional safety. I know from experience that as long as I focus my energy on taking care of the emotional and physical needs of others, I will be loved and accepted.

Now this isn't logical as evidenced by the anger and passive/aggressive backlash I receive from those I caretake, but initially when I am solving their problems for them, they act like they appreciate it and that is good enough for me.initially. But it's like the old saying "It may be hell but it's home." That's the way I feel about my current dysfunctional patterns, they may cause me pain but at least it is pain with which I am familiar. To make the choice to incur new and different pain and experiences by changing my patterns is not something that I and my inner child are ready to take on. So we live with the present set of circumstances and this is the biggest pitfall to healing ourselves.

Financial Stability


Finances improve once you reach the level of consciousness where you are at peace with allowing your Soul to provide for you and you have the knowing that you placed financial prosperity as one of your rewards on your Life Blueprint. You are also aware that you will be provided for until you reach that level of trust in yourself and all present issues of lack are just opportunities that enable you to see the many areas in which this fear about money impacts your life. My husband and I have experienced many difficult and frightening periods of financial instability during this ascension process. We know all about taking a calculator to the grocery store and adding up the items we put in the cart to make sure we have enough money. We have experienced the embarrassment of having to put things back in the checkout line with other people watching because we didn't have the money. And this is just one of the many things we have experienced.

But now, that seems to have changed. The money is coming, not as plentiful as we would like, but at least it is what we need to pay the bills and even invest in new computer equipment for the company. We have finally reached the level where were are okay spending large sums money at the beginning of the month knowing that the bills will get paid at the end of month. We have learned to do what Wayne Dyer, the author of You'll See It When You Believe It calls "living on purpose." There have been many times in the past, before I began the ascension process, that I did this very thing. I called it "winging it on faith", but it was never done with the consciousness and knowingness that it would work. That is the biggest difference as far as I am concerned.


Even though my husband and I have mostly lived a life of plenty, the biggest negative for me was the fear of losing my home, not being able to buy clothes for my child, or food for the table. It was the sleepless nights when I racked my mind trying to find a way to pay the bills. It was the disheartening feeling when I wanted to do something but the money was not there to do it. It was the fear that gripped my stomach as I waited for my credit card to clear at the check out, and the red-face embarrassment when it didn't. Personally, I detest these money problems and no matter how much I try to tell myself they are necessary and good for my spiritual growth, I still sometimes get down and depressed.

Even today, when the money is starting to be a little more abundant, I am still nagged by these feelings. Guess it will take a while and a lot more months of bills paid on time for me to get beyond them. I still don't trust that the money will continue to flow because I know I still have levels of growth to attain in this area. Keep in mind, too, that the monetary system in place on this planet is based on fear. We are all in the process of integrating this fear and thereby changing the systems as we do so.

Known Pitfalls

The biggest pitfall I know of is the feeling of hopelessness attached to the thought that the financial struggle will never end, that there will never be enough money and that I will never be able to figure out how to get out of my own way long enough to allow the money to flow. I know this isn't true but it still feels that way. I find that I have to go off by myself and mentally and emotionally process through these feelings using the Formula of Compassion. When I do this, I eventually find my balance again and often times I have a windfall of cash afterwards because I have expressed and cleared and transmuted another layer of this old way of thinking. I encourage you to give it a try.

I know that my money issues are caused by my choice to block prosperity due to some deep-seated fear. At first I thought the fear was the fear of success but that is only a small part of what blocks me. The truth for me is that I fear that if I become successful I will have to give up my privacy and furthermore, that I won't be able to fulfill everyone's needs well enough to keep their acceptance and approval. I am working on this and since the money is flowing, perhaps I have gained some ground. Who knows? Only time will tell. Believing that "if it is spiritual it should be free" is another of the big pitfalls that plague not only those on the ascension path but also the spiritual community as a whole.

Only a few people that I have met have figured out that the above concept about money and spirituality is a scam perpetrated on the world by organized religion, e.g., "filthy rich." And as a result, those who were once financially empowered are now disempowered because they believe they must give away their work instead of charging the money that would enable them to keep going. I have seen many good spiritual magazines, schools and other projects fail because of this philosophy. It's really sad.

The final big pitfall is one that I have had to struggle with more than once. This pitfall is the idea that bankruptcy is wrong and should never be used. When I experienced my first bankruptcy at the age of 30, I thought I could never hold my head up in public again. I was ashamed and felt so guilty. And even though my bankruptcy was due to a series of synchronicities that I could only call "bad luck" at the time, I still felt embarrassed and ashamed. Like so many other, I was taught that if I went bankrupt, I would no not be able to financially recover afterwards. My financial future was doomed. I believed that I would no longer be able to buy a car, a house, have a credit card or function in society anymore. This, I have discovered through experience is just not true.

First, the taboo around bankruptcy was created by the government systems that want to keep you in their control through money. The more you owe, the more they control you. Bankruptcy is the way out and they know it. Therefore, they have taught you not to take that out. Secondly, when I declared bankruptcy it wasn't more that two months before I began receiving offers from credit card companies, car dealerships, and home financing companies. At first I was shocked. I couldn't believe what I was seeing! After some investigation, I discovered that there is a whole industry developed just for bankruptcy because there are so many people declaring bankruptcy. So if you are facing this financial situation, don't sweat it. You will recover and probably faster than you think. Do some investigation like I did. You will find it to be all a game of electronic numbers moving between banks. If your bankruptcy is due to circumstances like a business failure, extended illness or supporting your spiritual work, and not because you intentionally went out and charged up your cards for ego related items, you have nothing to feel bad about. From a higher dimensional perspective, bankruptcy is a lesson in learning to let go of any ego attachments to financial status, and any associated image i.e., credit rating. Basing your self-worth on your credit rating is just as empty as basing it on your looks, the size of your home, where you live, or family breeding, etc. So let it go and get on with your life. Many Lightworkers will go through the lesson of bankruptcy to clear away ego attachments like the ones mentioned above. And for some of us, it may have to be more than once.



Relationships become stronger, more peaceful and more emotionally satisfying due to the increased level of trust that is created by being able to be real and speak your truth. After years of acquiring and losing friends, I have finally learned that I can actually have friends with whom I can cuss, fuss, fight and still be loved. We have been through many confrontations and because we all use the higher dimensional tools, we are able to see the aspect of ourselves the other person in showing us and release one another from blame. Once this occurs, we find we have reached a new level of trust and that is very satisfying.


Having relationships end because the other person is not aware of higher dimensional understanding and/or is not on the ascension path is heartbreaking. To me, the hardest relationships to lose are the ones with spiritual people who get caught up in blame and cannot see the mirror or are not willing to accept responsibility for their actions. For some reason, I feel they should know better because they are spiritual, but that is not necessarily logical. Known Pitfalls Learning when to let go of a relationship and "hold on to nothing" because it is just not capable of being balanced right now, and doing so without guilt or blaming of oneself or the other person is still a real challenge for me. It is an area where I need considerable growth and understanding. I have yet to get beyond being angry when I am rejected.

Spiritual Challenges

Spiritual challenges is a catchall for the things that I want to share, but don't necessarily fit into the above categories. They are the challenges that many, if not all of us, have faced at one time or another on the ascension path. Wanting to go too fast... I recently met a client that reminded me of myself just a few short years ago. When I urged him to slow down and walk instead of running, he became very disappointed. He didn't see any reason or value in slowing down. He wanted to recode his DNA and ascend as quickly as possible. When I pointed out to him that his many physical problems (broken bones, deep cuts) as well as the extreme obstacles that he had experienced were signals that he needed to slow down, he just shook his head in disbelief. I understand all too well how he felt.

Having to slow down and take baby steps triggered intense anger and fear inside of me at one time. But what I have come to see after many painful experiences is that our bodies can only go so fast due to their density and when we get out of step with the pace that supports them we suffer. Broken bones, car accidents, hitting our legs on furniture, walking into walls, are obvious signals that we need to slow down, and take ascension one step at a time. Trying to go too fast will not get us there any faster. We will still arrive exactly when we are supposed to arrive. When we take baby steps, we avoid a lot of pain and the burnout that many feel because of that pain. When we take baby steps, we empower ourselves to ascend with grace and greater ease.

Frustration about the Mission...

Many of those on the spiritual path feel that they have missions to complete in service to humanity. I have found from my own experience that not knowing what the mission is, or better yet, not realizing that I am already fulfilling it in part, is one of the greatest frustrations I have ever known. It triggers my feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness, and makes me feel that I am not doing the job I came here to do. Now I understand that there is a period of training that must be completed before we begin the actual work of our mission and this period cannot be hurried or shortened in any way. I have hit many walls in trying to do so.

The other thing that I have learned about our missions is that our wanting to know all the details of what we will be doing is detrimental to our success. When I first asked many years ago in a channeling session, Devin, my guide, informed me that all would be revealed in time. I, being the mental person that I was at the time, took that as his controlling me by withholding information. We got into an argument as I accused him of this. His reply was, and I quote, "If I was to inform you of all that you will be doing, you would immediately say, 'I can't do that, I don't know how,' and get into fear about it. That, dearest one, would place an unnecessary block in your path that would take more time to remove. Now do you really want that?" I got the point.

So what I am saying here to all of you who are fretting over the fact that you don't know what you are to do and fear that you may miss it when the time arrives because you don't recognize it, you will not miss it. When the training period is over, your work will be launched and the people, opportunities and the money will all be there to start it. It will be a flow.

Losing touch with spirit guides...

During the journey to ascension there will be many times that your guides will seem to disappear. In actuality they are still there, they are just standing back to see what you will do with the information and training you have already been given. These periods of silence can be very disconcerting and lonely, but I assure you that your guides are still very close by. I find that these periods usually coincide with intense lessons and what I call "Dark Nights of the Soul." You may get angry with your guides because you feel they have abandoned you in your greatest time of need but they know that you not only arranged to be alone, you asked them not to step in. All this was done before you were born. You wanted to see if you could stand on your own two feet and integrate the fears coming forward without assistance.

I assure you, your guides suffer right along with you and many times have to bite their tongues to stay out of your way. Like a mother who has to consciously stop herself from trying to assist her toddler who is determined to walk, so your guides go through the same emotions. But remember, your Soul is still there to guide you. Your Soul is not bound by these prior arrangements so he/she will always be there to assist but not caretake (enable). Thus, self-empowerment becomes a lived reality.

Staying grounded...

This is one of the greatest challenges for many people on the spiritual path as well as the ascension path. Staying grounded requires our participation in 3D and many of us have a great disdain for such things. I will assure you that without grounding in 3D, the things we need to accomplish our missions will not come to us, i.e., money, food, shelter, etc. This is one of the secrets of the ascension path. We must learn how to create a balance between physically being in 3D while existing simultaneously in the other levels of multi-dimensionality.

One other thing, I have found that when I am not grounded, I appear to be invisible to others. This not only creates some of the rejection I mentioned earlier, it can be dangerous when driving because other drivers literally do not see your car. Letting go of "out there"... Hanging out on the astral plane, astral traveling and just downright existing in nirvana through prolonged meditation, while feeling extremely satisfying to us, is also a great detriment to our missions. As I mentioned before, we cannot complete what we came here to do if we are not heart-connected to the planet. If you are still allowing yourself to feel strong desires to be "out there" you will not be able to be fully "here." You will not be present and on purpose.

At some point, you have to make a choice. Either choose to be here, complete your mission and enjoy the good things that 3D has to offer, or stay out there and continue to experience financial stress, difficult relationships, and all the other things that come with separation from your physical form and planet upon which you reside. You may also, of course, choose to abandon your mission and return home. Whatever you choose, be conscious and responsible rather than being a victim of longings and homesickness

So I'll let you in on a little secret because I'm a big caretaker (can't stop myself), if you chose to become heart-connected to Earth, you will find that you can have both. Getting from the mental into the emotional... When I began this work, I was very mental. When my guides informed me of this, I thought they were off in the head. When I would go to them for meetings, I spent most of our session asking questions about earth, the universe, history, my past lives and a myriad of other things. They indulged for a while but then stopped answering my questions. Instead, they wanted me to focus on my emotional clearing and becoming more heart centered and less head centered.

Now, several years later, I understand why. Having all the facts and knowledge about the worlds around us is not as important as knowing and loving ourselves. I also found that if I did my internal work, reestablished the relationship with my Soul and Ego and improved my psychic abilities, I would then be able to find those answers about the worlds right within myself, thus freeing my guides to do more important work. I hope this article provides some answers and a more realistic view of the ascension path. I realize that it is rather long and involved. Actually, it turned out to be more that I had intended it to be when I began writing.

And, of course, as I mentioned in the beginning, these are my perspectives on the ascension path and are based on my 4 years of experiences, so you are free to disregard them if they don't fit for you. Well, after all this writing I see that I have only scratched the surface in regards to the joys and challenges we experience on the ascension path. And I also realize that many topics I have written about need more in-depth discussion. If you have questions in these areas or wish me to expound on any of the topics, please feel free to contact me. I will put them on my list for upcoming articles. Until next time.

Warmest Regards,

Jelaila Starr

The Nibiruan Council